Kid Stuff?!? No Way...

I don't get it. I just don't. I mean those stuff are really creepy. Totally not for kids. Nah, I won't have my future kids go and watch those kinda stuff.
I'm talkin about three movies by the way. Three children's movies that really freaked me out. Harry Potter, Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory, and...Alice In Wonderland.
Yes, you heard me right. I mean what kinda sicko would want an innocent child watch a movie about some man named Wonka who owns a prefectly freaky chocolate factory that has a terribly small door on the outside and a monstrously huge on the inside? That kinda stuff messes up an adult's mind, what more can it do to a child?
Okay so you might say that kids don't pay attention to those details. So how about the singing part on the train ride in the dark tunnel with the surroundings spinning and the camera focused on the extremely creepy emotionless face of Wonka? That's terror man! Still not enough? How about the freaky office then? The one with every stuff is in half? You gotta watch the movie to know what I am talkin about. As if it ain't freaky enough that it is an oldie movie. And all those stuff I am speaking literally.
Oh yeah...the Harry Potter. Right. Well, since the first of the four movies was released, I did get to watch it but a mystery lies about it 'coz strangely I fall asleep on the first 5 minutes of the movie. On it went, the curse, up to the fourth installment. I wish that "curse" stayed with me. Last night I did get to watch the first movie without falling asleep and I say...THAT movie was scary. Yes. Terrorizing even to the minds of the not-so-innocent. First on the line...that hideously large dude named Hagrid. He couldn't even knock on a door without breaking it. And he casts spells that would give you a tail. Uh-uh...freak. Oh and that ghost dude whose head hangs by a single thread of skin. It's just so brutal to let a character like that talk...AND HE'S A F***ing GHOST!!! Oh and before I forget...the humongous dog with three heads!!! What else...hmm...yeah the moving stairways are scary too...and the villains are always up to their task of terrorizing not only the good guys but even the viewers. CREEPY indeed. Definitely not for children below...say...30 years old.
You're all wondering why I included Alice in Wonderland right and not Beauty and the Beast or The Little Mermaid. Well...imagine yourself being lost in a dream-like world wherein everytime you cry, you grow big and I am talkin' BIG as in you drown in your own tears. Plus being chased down by a deck of armed playing cards ready to kill you anytime...running down a puzzle of tall hedges in a green garden...scary! Oh and finding in the middle of the forest a creepily-smiling dude having tea with a rabbit(?) and laughing at you when you ask directions for home. One more thing...as you've noticed I am a bit fond of doors...well, imagine you can't open a door to your freedom because the door knob talks! Ugh...I am all shudders. Doors, why do there have to be doors!?!Nah...no way I am letting my future kids watch that.NOOOO way. I suggest you do the same.