Persona Non Grata

The problem with growing up in an interracial community is growing up with no racial identity at all. Being mixed up with all the different cultures lets one choose beautiful bits and pieces from each of those that surrounds him/her. This is the advantage of the situation. But from the gathered pieces, most of them contradicts to the original one thus resulting to the unacceptance of one's real race.
Speaking of cultural indifferences is very similar to that of when discussing morality. What and which is moral or immoral? In one religion, an action might be seen as immoral while another might be the other way around. Let us not speak of religion though.
The question of people like me is, where do we stand? Where is our place? And lastly, the most common of all, who are we?
I am a citizen of a land I can't call home and a foreigner to that of I which I consider home. I have no place. I am the loophole in the pledge for patriotism. My criticisms are unaccepted in every possible point of view on both sides for I am either considered a racist or an ungrateful citizen.
We are silenced against our will. We are accused of lacking knowledge of the land which "morally" they say as ours. Again, morality--only a point of view/opinion. That's what I'll consider it.
The solution for my own peace will be to let go of all hearsays and let my mind speak free of will. Humility, an unforgiving method and an important recipe in the gulag simply called life.

Just Me

A year has gone by without saying goodbye. Its been a run. Its been one heck of a life. I am thankful for every blessings I've had. The family that never fails to ruin my day but still stay the love of my life. The good school that seems to never want to let me move on with a good life without going thru its torture. The money that stays lost even when its found. The friends that hates me for whom I've become but loves me for being who I am. Everything I have said is all meant to be good. For they played a vital part on who I am. So even a bad is good as it is part of the irony of living which "they" call balance.

Its my birthday today. I don't know what's the big deal with them birthdays. I mean, okay okay a person was born on the given date! So what!?! I was raised in a family that never celebrates birthdays because of religious beliefs. I for one should get used to not making a big deal out of it. But here I am and blimey yes it is a big deal when people do forget about it. Hoosah.

So I am starting my day with the usual loneliness. Uh-huh. A day all to myself is a good thing, I'd usually say. My birthdays are spent as days of reflection. These are the times I do listen to "older" people's advices. I have not recieved a single encouragement for my dreams. Somehow everyone thinks that I would do better if I went the other way. There is no potential in me that will work with other "opportunities" other than for that of which I love. Crazy crazy world out there with crazy crazy people.

My awareness has been very keeny lately. Literally speaking. Just a while ago, I was looking for a decent place to have brunch in. And I came across a little diner which scared the hell out of me. Why? Because it was called Ran's Goattee. I was curious but not enough to try the place out. I mean what in the world do they serve in there? Moustache soup, fried goatee, steamed sideburns and iced pubic hair for dessert!?! Like I said, crazy crazy crazy world with people of the same state.

Its good to know that though I am becoming older, some things in me just don't change. My constant complaining for one. I love to complain about everything. It makes everything easier to deal with. So I give myself credit for being such an ass...most of the time. I mean, why not? After all, it just me.